There is always a silver lining! Every cloud has a silver lining! So whilst on the face of it the idea of being separated from your loved one is very concerning, there are many reasons why this can actually strengthen your bonds.
Having bonded with your loved one, so effectively sectioning part of your psyche to include a pyschological self identification which include that other person can make separation feel like the death of a love done! It does not have to be this way however. In this layman’s article we intend to discuss how your intentional pyschological approach combined with the incredible digital communication devices at our disposal means that we can almost completely reverse the impact of the separation scenario!
(Before we do that though… and until we speak again do this one thing… pick up the phone today and be a blessing intentionally to someone else today… take care now … until we speak again best wishes)
Ok! So. Intentionality is the secret to success in strengthening and thriving in a long distance relationship scenario. Perhaps you met through a Date Cardiff Singles website or The Cardiff Dating Site! Then your relationship deveolped and now this opportunity has arisen which will necessitate a physical separation for some time. Once you understand and are on board with the reasons for the separation (sometimes many thousands of miles) or in a sense the mission if you will, then separation can be completely fine! This could happen at any age, so if you met through the Mature Cardiff Dating groups that is fine and the same rules can apply. Lets just quickly isolate a few reasons. So career, your partner could be on a military mission to effect regime change undercover in a foreign country. They could be surrounded by dangerous circumstances but know that once they have completed the mission that they will receive an incredible financial reward! This will change your lives for the better and while she may not want to go into the details of things that she had to do even while under cover nonetheless in the interests of avoiding mission creep it is essential to get on board and completely support the scenario.
Once both people commit to the objective they are deeply comforted by the ability to contact each other at anytime. This is done via satellite enabled communication devices, with video conferencing, zoom and many apps which allow real time video/skype type instant visual communication! Even on a more basic level simple text messaging is really helpful. Sometimes this can be very practical at the beginning when you may need for example the password to the bank account in order to pay bills!
So thinking objectively, communicating the mission objectives and staying in regular contact via digital apps and mobile communication devices means that when the reasons make sense then really people can cope. So really the way to deal with this is that it really is part of the plan. Additionally, and this could be explored more deeply than we are here, but going back to the older practice of writing letters is actually extremely romantic! Even attaching a lock of hair or memento to the letter itself. In a letter one can sit alone and write your thoughts down. It is really quite therapeutic and of course when your loved one receives the letter it really is very exciting opening the letter!
So, getting organised, being proactive, not reactive and setting in place the objectives and really avoiding mission creep is paramount!
Please take care and make sure that you are being safe in everything that you are doing. For example sometimes it is better not to discuss exactly whats happening with everyone around.
Very best wishes and we look forward to speaking again.
We are at your disposal.
The InTouch Rugby Relationships and Mental Health Editor.
